thank you for this. I think this is a very important topic especially in a culture like ours that is essentially death denying and doesn’t encourage us to live our lives in a way that prepares us for death. I have a couple of questions. You speak of sharing our merit with those who have passed. I have had cause to do this over the past year but I struggle with knowing exactly what this means. maybe my meditation is not yet mature enough to do it effectively? I mean i get the concept but when i try to do it in my meditation i have no idea whether i am actually doing anything or what merit i have to share, i feel like i am just offering up a vague wish but nothing more specific. I have noticed that how connected it feels does depend on how still and concentrated i am but even in my stillest moments I still dont really know what im doing .is it a form of prayer. i can connect with metta in a living way that feels tangible and connected to the person or people i am sending it to but when i try to share merit i dont know what it is i am supposed to be doing. is it similar to metta?
the other question is one that perhaps there is no answer to but i am curious what your opinion or insight into it is. my cousins baby died without explanation recently. he was two months old. i am wondering what is happening there, why does the life supporting a seemingly perfectly healthy vibrant baby suddenly cease? I guess it has karmic roots and is probably different in each case but it just seems so random and so unbelievably tragic.